"Guys, Ever Feel Like You're Speaking a Different Language When It Comes to Emotions?"
Date: Thursday 06 Mar 2025
Alright, gentlemen, let's have a chat. Ever feel like you're not quite on the same page as others when it comes to talking about feelings? Like everyone else got the emotional dictionary and you somehow missed the delivery? You might be experiencing something called Normative Male Alexithymia (NMA).
"NMA? What's That Then?"
Simply put, NMA is a fancy term for why a lot of men struggle to put their feelings into words. It's not about being deliberately closed off or trying to be "macho." It's often a result of the messages we've picked up growing up about what it means to be a man.
"So, It's Like Being Told to 'Man Up' All the Time?"
Pretty much. From a young age, many blokes are told to "toughen up," "shake it off," or "don't be a wimp". The message is clear: emotions are a sign of weakness. So, we learn to bottle them up, ignore them, or deal with them in other ways.
"Okay, I Get It. But Why Does It Matter?"
Good question. NMA can have a bigger impact on your life than you might think:
• Mental Health: Suppressing emotions can lead to increased stress, anxiety, and even depression. It's like putting a lid on a pressure cooker – eventually, it's gonna blow.
• Relationships: Ever wondered why it's hard to truly connect with your partner, mates, or family? NMA can make it difficult to express your needs, build intimacy, and resolve conflicts.
• Just Generally Feeling Stuck: If you can't understand your emotions, it's tough to make good decisions or figure out what you really want in life.
"Right, So How Do I Fix It?"
Here's the good news: you're not doomed to a life of emotional silence. You can learn to understand and express your feelings:
• Start Small: Try noticing how your body feels when you experience different emotions. Do you get a knot in your stomach when you're stressed? Does your heart race when you're excited?
• Talk to Someone You Trust: Find a mate, family member, or professional you feel comfortable opening up to.
• Challenge Those Old Beliefs: Ask yourself: is it really "weak" to show emotions? Or is it a sign of self-awareness and strength?
• Find Healthy Outlets: Exercise, hobbies, or creative activities can help you process emotions in a constructive way.
• Consider Coaching: Coaching is becoming a more accepted way for men to work on themselves. It's more action-based, and less about "therapy," which some men find more appealing.
"Where Can I Get Extra Support?"
There are resources designed specifically for men:
• Blethr: Blethr is a free and anonymous platform where you can explore your thoughts and feelings without judgment. It's like having a confidential chat with a mate who's got your back.
• Men's Groups: Joining a men's group can provide a sense of community and support.
• Mental Health Professionals: If you're struggling, don't hesitate to reach out to a therapist or counsellor.
"Alright, I'm Willing to Give It a Go."
That's the spirit. Breaking free from NMA isn't about changing who you are. It's about expanding your emotional toolkit and building a more fulfilling life. It's about understanding yourself better and developing emotional intelligence. Taking that first step is the hardest, but you can do it.
Get more information here: https://www.brothersinarmsscotland.co.uk/mens-wellbeing-advice/why-so-many-men-struggle-with-their-emotions/
Learn more here: https://www.brothersinarmsscotland.co.uk/mens-wellbeing-advice/why-don-t-men-talk-about-their-feelings/