Challenging Toxic Masculinity for Men's Mental Wellbeing
Date: Tuesday 05 Nov 2024
“When I finally went to therapy, I had a wonderful, compassionate therapist who told me, “Your feelings are always right for you.” This was a sea change for me, someone was telling me for the first time that my feelings—no matter what they happened to be—were acceptable.”
In "Personal Perspective: Tough-guy masculinity promotes emotional suppression," Phil Lane examines damaging societal myths about masculinity. He highlights their detrimental impact on men's mental wellbeing. Lane argues that traditional views of toughness discourage men from expressing emotions or seeking help. This leads many to suffer in silence.
Lane reflects on growing up in a culture that revered stoicism. This created a significant stigma around sensitivity and vulnerability. It made it challenging for men to confront struggles with anxiety and emotional turmoil. He recounts his personal journey with anxiety and panic attacks. Initially, he resisted self-exploration, believing seeking help was a sign of weakness. Lane emphasizes that true strength comes from vulnerability. He shares a pivotal lesson from a compassionate therapist: “Your feelings are always right for you.”
This perspective shift helped Lane realize that experiencing emotions is a human quality, not tied to gender. He stresses the importance of dismantling harmful narratives. Men should express their feelings and seek support without fear of judgment or being perceived as weak.
At Brothers in Arms, we believe supporting our emotional wellbeing is essential. It is a positive pathway to enhancing our mental wellbeing. By encouraging open conversations and self-exploration, we aim to empower men. We provide a safe space for them to express emotions and seek assistance on their own terms. This approach fosters resilience and strengthens mental wellbeing.